Lots of emotions lately... 

Once again... 'Life' is so unpredictable! 

My utmost fear in my whole life is losing someone close to me! That's the only fear I have right now... The rest, I am not afraid... 

I could still recall my 10 days break back to my hometown last month! I insisted on wanting to visit KK where my mum's ashes are kept! This time, I made sure everyone in my family visit together and it really happened! It's been such a long time to have such great happiness with my family... Lots of emotions but I am glad of what we did coz it's the 1st time where everyone including all the kids comes together and I know my mum would be very happy to see all of us, especially with the kids too! 

During the 3 days trip in KK, despite my leg injury, we travelled everywhere from morning til night as I wanted everyone to have fun and to maximize the time spent together! I forced everyone to wake up early in the morning to have breakfast which indeed was a happy moment for me... not sure about them as they might feel sleepy :-) Actually, this kind of holiday opportunities are very rare because its always hard for everyone to have a good timing to travel together especially when my holiday period is always unpredictable and kids need to go to school too! Therefore, I really cherish all those moments with my family! 

My brother's daughter has always been afraid of me ever since she was born and never have I carried her once coz whenever I'm back in Brunei, its only like a few days. However, my most recent trip brought much closer... I brought them to toy stores and when we reached our room at night, I would open up all the toys we bought and played with them all night... I was like a daddy and at the same time acting like a small kid! You know what... when you 'Cherish' something, it can be very simple yet very happy...This is something that all of us need to discover, unfold and blend into our life. 

Am really thankful to my family who is willing to sacrifice and let me share most portion of my life with so many of you. In Brunei, my family is what I cherish the most but in Showbiz, I cherish you all the most! All of you are like special friends to me... Maybe we've never talked or met in person but the proximity and the power to influence is always there! Unfortunately, there are just too many of you and some of you might think that there is unfair treatment and start to make comparison (like who i like better or give special treatment) but its really something which I cannot control and has always try to handle appropriately! Well, What I know is... many of you are mature enough and I just hope everyone will cherish the times we spent together and be happy:-) Just like the autograph session, I dont even feel my signature is of any importance because what matters to me is the interaction between us.. that's the 3 seconds I cherish in every autograph session :-) 

Honestly, I've got so much to think of recently... 

Actually, its time for us to start filming in the upcoming months but recently, I began to wonder about life... 

- Indeed, there are a number of jobs opportunities for me lately - Let go of some, still holding on to some... 

- Thought of attending courses abroad to improve my skills on acting, singing, dancing, drums and my mandarin as well! 

- Fitness Zone - Plans for upcoming club and new management which requires my presence... 

- Brunei Bedroom Renovation - A major facelift which requires me to keep track on! 

All of the above are so important... 

If I choose to go back to Brunei, it would be more personal but at least I could spend more time with my family. 

If I choose to do courses abroad, i can learn what i wanted and be a greater performer so i wont let everyone including myself down and yet be able to take a break and enjoy a short period of half work - half vacation abroad! 

If I choose to film, most of my supporters including my company would think this is what I should be doing since I have been absent from the screen for quite some time now and many would anticipate seeing me again soon on-screen. Well, it would be wise to film again as I could learn and experience more but of course huge pressure and stress will come but I know its a challenge and its my job to overcome it! 

Phewww... its really hard to decide! Whether to lead a more enjoyable and relaxed life or to go full swing and challenge my job... well, I need to decide this month! It's a big decision for me and let's hope April is the best and most ideal month for me to make the best decision for 2009! 

Quote to share: - 

Life is short

Break the rules

Forgive quickly

Love truly

Laugh constantly

And never stop smiling

No matter how life turns out to be

Life is not always the party we expected to be

But as long as we are here, we should try to smile and be grateful

Cherish life and be your best!

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